Things I've learned about motherhood

1. The worrying doesn't stop after the baby is born.
2. Sleep is nice, but it's overrated (I say this while wanting to hunt down the author of every article which explains how necessary a good night's sleep is and whack him over the head with a baby bottle).
3. Smiles are wonderful things and make up for general state of overwhelmingness that takes over a new parent's life.
4. Baby clothes are so freakin' adorable.
5. You'll learn what multitasking is really all about.
6. You'll learn how to do nearly everything one handed, including getting dressed, typing, preparing dinner, driving . . . okay, maybe not driving.
7. You'll forget how to eat your food slowly like a normal person in an effort to finish a meal, just one meal, before the baby wakes up.
8. It's never a good idea to play superbaby after said baby has just eaten and has the hiccups if one does not want spit up in one's hair.
9. Never, ever, ever give a baby a bath directly after eating. Bad idea. Bad. Unless you actually enjoy floaters.
10. Poop happens and will happen all over your baby, your baby's clothes, the changing pad, and you no matter how hard you try to keep it contained, and you will learn not to care or go "Ewww!". In fact, you will start calling your husband in to witness and be amazed at the extent of the carnage. And then you'll wish for a video camera because something like this really should be captured for posterity.